How many ladies did I want to go off on in the SPM play area?

What a blog title, right? By the way SPM means South Plains Mall, the Lubbock mall.

Friday after school, my good friend Jenn K and I decided to try and have a play date at the mall where we could catch up. We figured it would be a fun, safe place for the Elise and Carley to play and I was excited about holding sweet baby Zane. (who is so precious, by the way) Well, Jenn and I had quite a hilarious hour. First of all, it was packed. All these big kids were left there to play while their moms went shopping. Nice. Do these moms not watch the news? Hello, Amber Alerts? Well anyway, there is a small slide made out of a safari truck that is super easy for Carley and Elise to go down. There were these little kids all over it blocking the steps and laying on the slide and stuff. They would jump in front of our little one year olds and then lay down where the girls couldn't get by. Elise and Carley were getting confused and Carley kept yelling, "Take turns, Carley turn, Take turn". I thought these kids moms would do something, but they didn't so Jenn and I got up and started lining the kids up and getting them to take turns. (yes, I am bossy at play areas too) Jenn and I keep wondering what the mom of the kids is doing. Well, Jenn found her. As you can see in the picture, here she is taking a NAP in the mall in the middle of the day for the whole world to see. Really, is that the best place to nap. Luckily, her friend was diligently watching the kids as she breastfed and dosed off herself. Once again, is this the best place to do this at 3:30 in the afternoon?

So Jenn and I are cracking up and naptime girl and her wild kids. We sit back down and this lady comes up to us with really heavy make up on and says, "Do I know you?". Jenn says, "no". I start laughing and the lady sits down next to us telling us that we are the cutest moms in the mall and she wants to show us her makeup. She then begins a Mary Kay demo. I can't handle it and stand up and go check on the line at the slide that I had beautifully orchestrated. Jenn is stuck there while this lady keeps pulling out sample upon sample. I sat back down and she makes the comment again that we are the cutest moms in the mall.

Let me just say that I am a lot of things, but I never have, nor never will be, the cutest mom in the mall. Ever. After a long day of work my make up was almost 12 hours old and my hair was coming out of its pony tail. My adult acne was shining and the dark circles under my eyes did not contribute to my cuteness in any way. Jenn is a cute mom, but she is also a new mom of two kids two and under who do not sleep at the same time. She looks great, but we were both exhausted.


So, I look at the lady and said, "We are not the cutest moms in the mall." She looked at me, gave us a lipstick sample, and went to prey on another "cute mom" with the same line of, "Do I know you?"

So why do you take your kids to the play area of the mall? To leave them there while you shop? To have them occupied while you sell Mary Kay? To have them busy while you take a little nap?

I literally wanted to yell at all three moms, but instead, my devilish heart knew I would receive some satisfaction in blogging about them behind their back! :) I love the Internet.